Looking Out

I feel like the strongest feeling in the world is love. I feel this way because I think I'm in love. He makes me laugh, he makes me cry, he consoles me, I wake up in the morning thinking of him, I go to bed at night thinking about him. When I talk to him, I actually care about what I'm saying. I care about myself. I care more in general. He makes me want to be a better person. I love him.

Love isn't a one emotion thing. It hurts more than anything that you've ever felt before, yet it can make you so happy that tears come to your eyes. It can make you jealous of complete strangers, to the point of making your body ache with hatred. It can make you laugh at things that aren't your idea of funny- and actually genuinely laugh. It can make you cry yourself to sleep over something that normally you wouldn't even think twice about.

It's a rollercoaster.

It puts blinders on you so all you see is one person. It can make you ignore people you shouldn't be ignoring. It can ruin friendships without you even caring. It can change your life.

It can make your interests change, to the point where you're a completely different person than you were before you fell in love, and you won't even realize that it's happening.

It can make or break you. Either way, you won't care, as long as one person loves you back.

You're not living for you anymore, you're living for them.

And god help anyone who gets in your way on your pursuit of happiness. You'll become a monster, and you'll mow down anyone who makes your mission even the slightest bit difficult.

There are times your plans don't work out, though. And you're left alone, crushed, and heartbroken. You feel like you can't possibly go on and you cry. You cry so hard that you end up numb, sitting alone in your bedroom, thinking of nothing but their face.

But it passes. All things do. Including love.

I feel everyone has secrets and it's getting increasingly hard to hide mine.

I feel when you love people, they deserve to know everything.

But everyone has times where they're scared of what their loved ones would think of them if they knew everything.

I don't know how I'm going to deal with this.